Becoming a Mother
Some say that motherhood begins the moment you realize you are carrying new life within you. When your body starts to change and yet you find yourself looking in the mirror feeling more beautiful than ever before.
I remember longing to finally see and touch the little being I was creating but sometimes fate writes another story.
I didn’t experience a normal birth nor the instant connection I had dreamed of. Instead, I stood by an incubator staring at a small human surrounded by cables and wondering if this fragile life was truly mine. It was the greatest confusion I’ve ever known. A mix of awe, fear and disbelief.
I was terrified to hold this tiny being, yet my heart broke knowing he might never live the life I had imagined for him. Still, something extraordinary happened, my love grew deeper and more unconditional with every day.
It took time, pain and many tears to learn to accept what is and to understand that love doesn’t always bloom the way we expect it to. But when it does, it changes you forever.
Continue reading the Journal:
• Journal — First Page
• The Space Between Then and Now
• Sehnsucht
• Mom, You're Boring
• Asking Myself
• Why Silence?
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